Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Victor T.


That’s what the slip of paper had written on it. It was hanging on the Christmas tree at my gym. Each slip had a name of a solider serving in Iraq with a few of his/her interest and hobbies. If we wanted to participate, we could select a slip and then bring in a stocking with some useful and fun items for that particular soldier – You know, beef jerky, socks, shampoo.

I choose Victor because I noticed he wrote he liked “Classic” movies on his slip of paper. Well, classic and action movies, as well as hunting and pudding. But that seemed enough like a kindred spirit that I took the slip off the tree.

I told my daughter about the project and we both got excited about doing something for someone else at Christmas time. We started calling Victor, “Our Solider”.

I kept the slip in my car where it seemed less likely to get lost in the avalanche of paper that intrudes my home daily. As I drove around on my endless errands I could see it wedged right behind the gearshift. Seeing it made me think of Victor. I wondered about his family, if he was young or younger, if he was scared or if he had learned to be impervious to what was going on around him.

When I had procrastinated long enough, my daughter and I went to Target and loaded up on the beef jerky, socks, hand warmers, pudding, other suggested items, and yes movies. I gave him what I think to be the most classic of classic movies-- Casablanca, and then some action movies for good measure. My daughter insisted that we give him Sponge Bob band-aids, and although it seemed to me that a band-aid might be the least of his worries, I tucked it in. We got so much stuff we had to get two stockings and tie them together. Even still I was pounding stuff into those stockings before we returned it to the gym before they shipped all the stockings off to Iraq.

Of course, I had to turn the little slip of paper in with the stocking, otherwise they wouldn’t know who to give it to. I was kinda sorry to do it. Having that little slip of paper in my car was like having a tiny bit of Victor there. It made me think about him. It made me think about a lot of things.

Outside of a few kids from our ward that I don’t know very well, I don’t really know anyone who is serving in Iraq. Getting that stocking ready for Victor made me feel connected with Iraq, made it real. As awful as war is, I think for us to forget about it here in our life of soft warm beds and singing Christmas Snowmen is even more awful.

Other than a few likes and hobbies, I don’t know that much about Victor. And of course he knows even less about me. He could pass me on the street and wouldn’t have a clue. But the thing about is, in spite of that, he has agreed to take a bullet for me. It’s a debt I can never repay. If I stuffed those stockings full of $100 bills I could never repay what I owe him. What I owe every soldier who is serving.

No matter what side of the aisle you stand on I think we all need to remember Victor, and every other soldier. It’s no small thing this contract they have with us. They are willing to endanger their life and well being for the good of our country, to go and serve and not question why but just do. The trust they put in us to not take that for granted, to not treat it like blank check… It’s a heavy burden, at least it should be. They are all “Our Soldiers”. We shouldn’t treat them any differently than we would our own sons and daughters, fathers and mothers, brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews.

I miss Victor. Actually, I’m really hoping he’ll write. I like feeling connected to the war somehow. I like feeling that I can make a small difference, even if it’s just one person. I wonder if that is how Victor feels too—that even just one person can make a difference.

He has made a difference. He may just be socks, pudding and classic movies on a slip of paper, but he made a difference to me.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Alright...you're back in


We had just finished taking a bath together. Tired with the day and the warm bath water, my daughter said she wanted to "snuggle." We curled up together in our robes on my bed. Her robe was new and fuzzy and pink and perfect for snuggling.

"Mommy?"

"Yes?"

"What's your favorite thing that I do?" she asked.

I surpressed the urge to say sleep.

"Well, I love lots of things you do. I love your smile and the way you say "thank you" all the time. I love your kisses and hugs, but I think my favorite thing you do is sing. I love to hear you sing."

"OK".

She got up and stood in front of the bed and sang "Angels We Have Heard on High" from start to finish, emphasizing the "Glooooooooooooooorrrrria" with great flourish.

She got back into bed and wiggled close to me again.

"Did you like that Mommy?"

Sniff.

"Yes, I liked that very much."

"I love you Mommy."

"I love you too sweetheart."

Alright....your back in.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Consider Yourself Warned!


I was commiserating with my friend Linda this morning on disastrous birthday parties for our kids, snotty attitudes, and children who are just plain determined to piss on the electric fence*. Linda has 4 kids ranging in ages from 15 to 3. I came into motherhood rather late in life, and have just 1. After telling her a little of the hell my petulant 4 year old has been putting me through lately, I said…

“Being a Mom…it kinda sucks.”

“Yeah, it does.” She agreed.

“Well, why didn’t you tell me?” I accused.

“Didn’t I?” She asked in earnest.

“No!”

It’s some sort of weird conspiracy mothers have. No one really tells you what a marrow sucking, soul retching battle it is. Ok maybe they do, but then it’s always followed up with, “Oh, but I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.”

And you, poor soul, buy it—hook, line and sinker. Well, I am stepping out and I’m telling you it sucks. Maybe that’s going to change, I’ll keep you posted, but for now you’ve been warned.

I know you’re not going believe me. You see those kids throwing a screaming mimi in the middle of the grocery store and you think it will be different with your kids. You are sure that with a firm hand and gentle pressure you can get your children to yield to your better judgment.

All I can say is when you have an ill-tempered, tantrum throwing, carpet pissing, abusive little brat trying to manipulate and control your every move morning, noon, and all through the night, you might just find yourself thinking…

“This kinda sucks.”


*"Some people can hear.  Some people gotta see.  ...And some people have just got to piss on the electric fence themself".

-Judge Mills Lane

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Is This Thing On?


"Where's the key?", she cried.